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The effects of domestic abuse most often leave victims and survivors feeling physically, mentally and emotionally drained. Carla, a woman who had been out of an abusive marriage for nearly a year, expressed it in this way: “I feel like the life has been sucked right out of me.” Carla admitted that even though there was no chance of her ever returning to her abusive husband, she had difficulty regaining momentum to rebuild her life to where she wanted it to be. Her enthusiasm had diminished to where the things that once excited her no longer held any sparkle or charm. She had lost her zest and zeal for life; her days had become routine and her actions robotic.
Feeling “empty” is an opportunity to refill yourself with the right stuff. Sometimes it’s necessary to empty out the contents of something that no longer serves you to be replaced with things that are more fulfilling. The first place to begin is with your thoughts; starting with the first thought you have when you awaken, to the last thought you have before falling asleep at night. It is our thoughts that create our reality. By changing your thoughts, you can change your life.
If you can relate to the way Carla feels, consider these 10 suggestions to help you refill yourself up with the right stuff:
1. When you wake up in the morning before getting out of bed, think of what you are grateful for and give thanks.
2. As you prepare for your day, think about one aspect of your day that you are actually looking forward to, regardless of how miniscule – that will put a smile on your face
3. In the course of your day, think of something that once excited you and take steps toward doing that particular thing again i.e., a hobby,a special class, gardening, artistry, etc.
4. Take a few minutes each day to close your eyes and visualize something that you really want and believe you are worthy of having it.
5. Volunteer a portion of your time in a place where you would like to be of service.
6. Take notice of the beauty and splendor of nature.
7. Keep a gratitude journal by your bed to write in the morning and/or at night.
8. Create a tranquil space in your home where you can be alone to pray or meditate and relax.
9. Engage in activities and connect with people that bring you joy.
10. Avoid people, places and things that are not conducive to your well-being.
Whether you reinvent yourself, or return to who you once were, by following these suggestions, you will begin to develop a deeper appreciation for everything in your life. So, refill your cup until it is running over with all the right stuff!
Editor's Note: Connie Sloane is a revitalization coach and the Founder of The Soda Foundation.
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